Mother of the Bride, Procastination & Trouble Spots

Here is the Aiden Mattox dress we agreed on.

The problem is...
my daughter's wedding is less than five months away.
There is quite a bit to do. My daughter is a take charge type of woman and my primary role in the affair is to do whatever she tell me to do.

That is the perfect role for me. Because I am a procrastinator, someone who works best under pressure. But weddings don't seem to fit into a "last minute- get it done" work style like mine. So it is best for me to be the passive "Yes" girl, during the next five months.

Actually, 137 days until my daughter's big day! So it is time for the mother of the bride to find a dress. This feels very similar to trying on bathing suits in February. Pastie white skin, rolls of flab and arms that look similar to crescent rolls before they are baked.

And here is what it really looks like.

Notice the "Trouble Spots"

But it isn't the dress that looks bad, and it's not me that looks bad, it's my TROUBLE SPOTS that look bad.

I guess I can't procrastinate any longer. 137 days to go and 25 lbs to lose. Wish me luck.

Flowers, Fungus, Fauna

Allium, Ally-up, 
Sometimes when I think all is futile and I don't want to move forward, all it takes is a little color to make the day seem worth while. The spring in New Jersey this year has been similar to both my personality and energy level; bland, chilly and nothing too spectacular.
But finally, the flowers are blooming and the Allium inspired me to get my butt up and out the door for my daily mind leveling walk with the dog.

Usually when I take Dunkin for his morning walk, I find myself looking down, thinking about work, which I already spend plenty of time doing & thinking about. Therefore, the last thing I want to think about is work when I am off. But inspired by the beautiful purple Allium, I tried to stay in the moment of the walk. I am very lucky to live near a nature path, which supplies me with views that transport me out of NJ and into the mountains of Maine.

But for some reason, today all I could focus on was work and fungus! I am not sure of the connection, but I realized fungus thrives in dark, damp conditions. It actually has a beauty all it's own!

So today I too will thrive like my fellow fungi, and blossom like the Allium!

Me and my shadow

Here I stand at 146.6 pounds. The calorie counter says "CONGRATULATIONS! 26 LBS TO GO!"
It might as well say 126 pounds to go, because I have been at this weight for days on end.

I joined a gym...where there motto is  "No Judgement", where everyone is welcome, except what they call Lunkheads. Muscle heads that throw weights around and grunt. It's a good fit for me as far as a gym goes. I can walk in, undetected, find a treadmill, watch one of 15 TVs, with no sound. I like it that way. First of all I don't own a headset, and I find watching the news or vampires or housewives with implants all much more interesting without sound.

I don't go very often, but the fee is about $10.00 per month, so I figure, even if I make it there once a month, it's worth the money. At the gym they don't really offer much instruction. But then again there isn't much to pushing the start button on a treadmill. The machine then asks me all the important questions..weight, speed, incline. It doesn't ask me how am I feeling today, or do I have any injuries, or high blood pressure. I like it that way. No intrusions and impersonal.

Truth be told, a quarter of a century ago, I was an aerobic instructor. I jumped and stepped and taught sculpting for ten fabulous years. It was probably the best job I ever had and certainly the most fun. Jane Fonda had a workout video which you can and should watch for some giggles at the 80's attire & hair! Now I'm in the same rut as everyone else. Working, eating on the run and not exercising.

But today is the day I start again. Entering my calories consumed, entering my activity and calories burned. I am going to feed my body and soul the nutrients it needs to go for the gold. Here is the start to my day. 

Apples, strawberries and banana. Yummy!

And here is the technical stuff.....I am off to a good start!

Logged Foods for May 04, 2013

Breakfast	Cal (kcal)	Carb (g)	Pro (g)	Fat (g)	SFat (g)	Chol (mg)	Sod (mg)	Fib (g)	Sug (g)	VitA (IU)	VitC (mg)	Calc (mg)	Iron (mg)	Ptsm (mg)
Gala Apple 76 grams	40	10.9	0	0	*	*	*	2.5	8.4	1	10	1	1	*
Peanut Butter, Smooth Style - With Salt 16 grams	94	3.1	4	8.1	1.7	0	73	1	1.5	0	0	6.9	0.3	104
Coffee - Black 1 Mug	2	0	0.4	0	*	*	5	0	*	*	*	*	*	*
Strawberries 50.2 grams	17.1	3.8	0.3	0	0	0	0	0.7	2.7	0	33	6.8	0.1	58
Bananas 41.3 grams	37	9.4	0.5	0.1	0.1	0	0.4	1.1	5.1	26	3.6	2.1	0.1	148
English Muffin - Original 28.4 grams	60	12.5	2	0.5	0	0	100	0.5	0.5	0	0	40	0.7	*
Meal Totals	250 21%	40 26%	7.2 12%	8.7 22%	1.8 14%	0 0%	179 14%	5.8 28%	18.2 61%	27 1%	46 62%	57 5%	2.2 28%	310 7%

Fitness- Dunkin style

Okay, it was a loooooooong, loooooooong cold winter, and a rather dreary spring. The time has come to get motivated, get up off the couch, find the motivation to move.

I have to admit, I am somewhat of a loner. I am not that good at following the crowd, or for that matter, having a large group of friends. I work in retail and that means long days, so I need inspiration to exercise at a moments notice, when I can fit it in.

After many false starts, and attempts at consistent daily exercise, I finally realize my need for a partner in fitness. Someone who will push me to walk, go to the gym. I am looking for someone who is happy, content in their day to day life. My training partner needs to be in decent shape, so they don't hold me back. I don't want a complainer, someone who whines about their spouse, children or job. Selfishly, I want my hour of fitness to be ALL about me!

Dunkin,my training partner and inspiration for a healthy lifestyle.

I dig my old sneakers out of the closet and we head out to the trails for our walk, which we have done many times before. But I hope this time is different, I hope I can keep going every day. It's more than weight loss I am after. I 'm looking for that peace of mind, contentment, zen that seems to come when you are fit, healthy and happy. Just like Dunkin.

5 decades strong

Dial back to March 29, the day before my 54th birthday. The scale reads 150...bloated, disgusted and fed up with myself as a whole, I resolve to eat healthier, exercise more. I give myself a list of positive habits: get up at 5am, enjoy the quiet moments of the day, walk the dog, make a healthy lunch for work...yadayadayada.

I started out strong. I stopped eating bread and pasta. I researched my IDEAL weight online- 128lbs. I found a food tracker/calorie counter on line, joined an inexpensive, no frills gym.

I managed to get to the gym 2x per week, I did a walk and run on the treadmill. I walked the dog, I ate carefully and put everything that crossed my lips on the food tracker http://caloriecount.about.com/cc/account/index.php.

And the weight started coming off. I dropped a little each day. Soon the scale read 146.2. Exciting!
 I was determined to get to 145.  Then it happened.

Ten days in, the self sabotage began. I cheated a little, walked the dog less, went to the gym less. Stopped putting entries in the food tracker. I cheated some more, never got up to enjoy the quiet of the day....yayayada.

Here I am today, 25 weeks until my daughter's wedding...20.8 pounds to go. What went wrong? Where is my resolve? How do I start yet again when I know my potential for failure looms large?

Bull Crap! I'm 5 decades strong and tomorrow I start again! care to join me?